I’d like to be able to say this recipe came to me in a dream  because that’s how it tastes and it makes you feel dreamy too. But no. It came to me last Thursday night while sipping a fancy vodka martini of good but lesser quality. And I was like, this is good but I can totally take this to the next level and I can make all the different boozes be from France! 

It’s equal parts Grey Goose Vodka and Green Chartreuse STIRRED! (don’t go all stupid “shaken not stirred” on this drink. Good martinis are stirred.) Strain into a cocktail glass, add a healthy splash of champagne and garnish with a twist of lime.

Here is a picture of a beautiful Claude Balzac Official Cocktail taken with a shitty phone camera. But don’t be fooled! This shit is decadent.  Ask for it by name. Thank me later for inventing the best drink you’ve ever had. It will make you feel so superior to all those around you not drinking Claude Balzacs that you will be tempted to spit some of your drink on them. But don’t waste it. Those unsophisticated miserable pissant Americans are not worth it. Just snatch their Jager Bombs from them and throw them back in their faces. There, that’s better.